NOPE! So DONE!

Saturday, November 11th in the wee hours...... Remembrance Day

Things got quiet. Was it done?

I opened my eyes to the Dojo, modified, a bit larger..... but no one is there. Where is everyone? Oh..... Felicity is there. What the hell? Did she do this? I demand that she FIX this.

Apparently it wasn't her, but Murazaki............... a therapist of some kind who "fixed" Felicity.

Why the Fuck am I here? I feel.... violated. Mindtrapped by someone I trusted to be trapped in a room with someone i really do NOT trust. What is this?! Lock the uncomfortable guy in the room with the one that makes him uncomfortable to 'work out their differences or make up' or something?! 

Great theory. DOES NOT WORK IN PRACTICE!

Felicity suggested that maybe we were there to learn from each other. She asked me what I thot I could learn from her. I was caught between knowing what I want and need... and being put on the spot and frozen by my stupid shyness and a ... an... anger so strong I could not even speak. There are a million things she could teach me, especially about magic and the ways I could use the magic I have to save lives instead of end them. But for all the things she has done.... however good she might be now... There is nothing I that I actually WANT to learn FROM HER. As for what maybe she could learn from me?

How about morals, ethics, respect... integrity... honor? .... my list goes on.

All I could give her was my fuming silence as I mentally SCREAMED to get out of this.

And then... it was over. 

Everyone was standing, congratulating each other, like... job well done.

Are we done? We are done. GOOD! I am DONE! Fuck off everyone!

I don't think I have ever been this angry in my life. Never felt this violated or contaminated. 

How could I ever trust anyone ever again? How could I dare say anything to my parents? They would never believe me. Murazaki is someone they all admire... even Felicity. I bet this is how rape victims feel.

I storm off from the Dojo... fuming.... furious... Definitely NOT feeling very ZEN.  A quick check that what I intended for my hut is what resulted. At least that went as planned.

I grab gear from my room and my backpack and storm off a bit into the woods.... How far can I hike? ARRRGGHH!!! FUUUCK!!! Stupid Horizon Realm. It will only wrap back. I was told this already. I storm back to my hut. 

Fine... I will purge, sanctify, and ward the fuck out of me and mine!